


to be one thing

by wondybread



Category: Wonder Woman (Movies - Jenkins), Wonder Woman - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, i just have some notes, mentions of diana/steve - Freeform, the movie wasn't Bad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:40:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29956260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wondybread/pseuds/wondybread
Summary: Both Diana and Barbara live quiet lives until their paths cross, and that's something like fate. The rest is up to them.
Relationships: Diana (Wonder Woman)/Barbara Minerva
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	to be one thing

Steve leaves Diana’s life the same way he came into it: as a brave soldier flying an airplane. He is everything she didn’t know she wanted. He is new and kind and mortal. And beautiful. He doesn’t remind her of home and he doesn’t make her think of the future. Diana thinks that might be something like peace. 

Steve is long gone now but it doesn’t feel that way to Diana. And in his absence, Diana is left aching. For him, of course. But also for everything else. _Everything_. Themiscyra, her mother and Antiope. The first woman she ever loved.

Diana can’t hold all this wanting in her hands, so she focuses on missing Steve instead. Because Steve was good. Steve was taken from her. 

Because she doesn’t feel shame when she thinks about him.

When the sun is on her skin, this is…manageable. To miss him and only him. But at night, her dreams don’t always choose only Steve. They’re more frequent, more vivid. Unrelenting. 

These last few years, especially, Diana aches for home. In her dreams, she sees flashes of her mother’s bright eyes, her reserved smile. Hears Antiope barking orders, her voice strong and sure. Feels a lover’s skin beneath her fingertips, smells sea salt and lilacs on her lover's hair. It’s all so painful. Sometimes they don’t feel like dreams at all. And Diana wakes with tears in her eyes and a hole in her chest she’s certain will swallow her whole.

Diana stops sleeping. Throws herself recklessly into her work at the museum during the day while discreetly running along rooftops and protecting people whenever else she may be needed. On quiet nights, Diana takes to patrolling the city, sticking to the shadows. Stays out as late as she can until she quite literally passes out from exhaustion. Only to do it all over again. Despite her immortality, it’s beginning to show in her face. And affect her mood.

 _A small price to pay_ , Diana thinks after another night of tossing and turning.

Diana is striding to her office the following morning, listless and tired, when she hears her. Or rather hears the scatter of papers and the subsequent huff of annoyance. Hears a woman’s voice, lilting nervously before going suddenly quiet.

Without thinking, Diana turns on her heel and kneels down for the papers.

“Good morning,” she greets. And though Diana gives the woman a somewhat distracted smile, she makes sure to look the woman square in the face. 

The first thing Diana notices about her are her eyes, honest like nothing she’s ever seen before. Not even Steve’s. Steve who was only a pilot that wanted to do some good in this world. _A spy_ , her mind corrects. As if it matters.

The woman gapes at her for a moment, seemingly startled by Diana’s presence. So visibly awestruck that Diana’s blood runs cold and she believes, for one brief and senseless moment, that this woman _knows_ who she is. 

But then the woman speaks, tone breathy and expressive in a way that Diana isn't used to. Diana relaxes a little. 

“Hi. Thank you.”

The woman glances away, a small smile at the corner of her lips already reaching her eyes. This woman’s face is open. Too open. Diana can’t help but feel a little wary of that.

They exchange names and areas of expertise. Well, Barbara _lists_ her areas of expertise.

“And part-time cryptozoologist,” Barbara finishes, flashing a companionable grin.

“Oh, wow,” Diana says and it’s all she really can say. It is impressive and it makes Diana wonder what she’s been been doing for the last sixty years.

“Kept busy in college,” Barbara replies dismissively, like it’s something that happened to her and not something she worked for. Other people would have bragged about it, but Barbara very much doesn’t. Diana doesn’t get her.

They’re nearly done picking up all of the fallen papers, and Diana’s mind is already upstairs with her mini pour over coffee set that she’d recently bought for her office. But Barbara is speaking again and Diana forces herself to remain present.

“Scientists don’t wear heels,” Barbara says with a rather nervous laugh.

“Sometimes we do. Have a nice day.” Diana turns to go, barely hears how Barbara backtracks and compliments her shoes.

Diana feels the tiredness in her neck, resists the urge to roll her shoulders and starts to move away. But it seems Barbara still wants to talk, and she falls into step with Diana.

“Do you wanna get lunch?” Barbara blurts out, abruptly earnest.

Diana doesn’t normally take a lunch. She’ll usually scarf something down as she’s reading research papers. But more recently, she’s been using her lunch break to catch a few minutes of sleep. Every day for the past month, in fact. She’ll lock her office door and curl up with a pillow and blanket she now has stored in her desk drawer. 

And, frankly, Diana doesn’t really trust Barbara. Barbara who has a smile ready on her lips and whose eyes are kind. Barbara who _must_ want something from her, even if Diana doesn’t know what it is just yet.

How to explain all that…

“I um – “ Diana starts but Barbara interrupts.

“Not now, obviously, it’s morning. But uh, later today or whenever like, around like a lunch time…”

“I have a lot of work today,” Diana replies, which is true. She has a few reports to review, catalogue and input some new pieces into their database. She needs to read those research papers that will actually have to wait now that she thinks about it, because she does plan on taking a nap. She vaguely remembers that she has to attend some online seminar too. Is that before or after lunch? And then there’s the jewelry thieves who did not take any jewelry.

Remembering all this makes the exhaustion feel even heavier on Diana's shoulders and she thinks longingly of her coffee in her office.

“But maybe some other time?”

“Oh. Yeah. I’m busy too…” Barbara says, the disappointment obvious in her tone. 

Diana feels a pang of something in her gut. She doesn’t want Barbara to feel unwelcome. But Diana’s exhausted. More importantly, it’s best for Diana to live on the outskirts, to not dive headfirst into other people's lives. She knows what will happen if she doesn’t. And what could Barbara possibly want from her that she couldn’t easily get from someone else? Someone who doesn’t dream of exploding airplanes and disappearing islands. Someone who doesn’t sleep at their desk at lunch. 

Diana has finally figured out a polite way to keep people at a distance. Barbara Minerva will be no different. Even if she does have a radiant smile.

But then Carol comes, looking for Barbara. Because she needs Barbara's help with an FBI investigation. For an attempted robbery of a jewelry store. So. Maybe Diana doesn’t have to spend too much time on that considering the investigation is right here. Which is good because that gives Diana time to maybe have lunch with Barbara instead.

 _Dinner_ , her mind amends, which for some reason is a better alternative. Diana already feels lighter.

Diana excuses herself quietly from Barbara and Carol’s conversation, bothered by how Barbara has managed to capture Diana’s attention in a matter of minutes. Diana shakes her head slightly. It’ll be good to break her rule, to get to know Barbara. She could have some unique insights into the investigation.

 _That’s it, nothing more_ , Diana thinks decisively, forcing herself to think of her coffee and not the way Barbara’s smile spills over into her eyes. Her impossible and sincere eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i remember in an interview for bvs, gal gadot had said something like diana has been trying to isolate herself from mankind in some way. and i couldn't help but think that barbara gets some version of that. also i refuse to believe that diana has never been in love prior to steve trevor. it's just not true.
> 
> thank you for reading!


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